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This is meant to be a humorous poke at the complaints that we tend harbour in our churches.
I hope you can learn to laugh at yourself as I have learned to laugh at myself.
Many blessings. :)

Lyrics

DEAR OLD SISTER SADY, SHE WON'T LET ME SIT IN HER PEW
THE PASTOR SPITS AND FUMES, OH WHAT'S A GUY TO DO
THE BABIES WON'T STOP CRYING, AND THE YOUTH JUST WON'T BE STILL
THE SERVICE IS WAY TOO EARLY AND YOU KNOW I LIKE TO SLEEP IN
I ONLY WANT THE LORD'S WILL IN THE CHURCH THAT I ATTEND
NO MATTER WHERE I GO THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHIN THAT OFFENDS

I GOT THE CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
THE HOLY ROLLIN DEPRESSIN CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
NO MATTER WHERE I GO
I'M ABOUT TO BLOW, MY CHURCH HOUSE BLUES

WELL THE SERVICE GOES ON AND ON, AND TIME IS TICKIN TOO
I JUST KNOW WE'RE GONNA BE LATE, AT THE REST'RAUNT FOR MY STEW
IF WORSHIP HADN'T BEEN SO LONG, AND THE TESTIMONIES TOO
YOU KNOW WE COULD HAVE HAD AN AFTERNOON FULL OF PEACE AND REST
BUT NOW I'M GONNA BE TROUBLED, DISTURBED, AND DISTRESSED
WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE THIS WAY; I GET SO DEPRESSED

I GOT THE CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
THE HOLY ROLLIN DEPRESSIN CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
NO MATTER WHERE I GO
I'M ABOUT TO BLOW, MY CHURCH HOUSE BLUES

THE SONGS ARE WAY TOO FAST; THEY'RE NOT THE FITTIN KIND
THERE'S SMOKE, AND LIGHTS, AND INSTRUMENTS; IT'S ALL HAPP'NIN TOO FAST
THEY'RE BREAKIN UP THE SERVICE WITH ANNOUNCEMENTS AND SUCH
I LOSE ALL MY ANOINTING WITH ALL THIS WORLDLY STUFF
OH ORD, OH LORD PLEASE HELP ME; I NEED A PLACE TO GO
WON'T YOU LEAD ME TO A QUIET PLACE THAT HONOURS YOU ALONE

I GOT THE CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
THE HOLY ROLLIN DEPRESSIN CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
NO MATTER WHERE I GO
I'M ABOUT TO BLOW, MY CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
I SAY NO MATTER WHERE I GO
I'M ABOUT TO BLOW, MY CHURCH HOUSE BLUES
I'M ABOUT TO BLOW, MY CHURCH HOUSE BLUES